The purest form of love, the never-ending saga of relationship, the deepest bond ever since the time, living beings evolved and the tiniest twinkle which remains in the eyes of all, and last but not the least, the hit dialogue of all times “Mere paas Maa hai”– Yes the ultimatum of love and binding- MOM, MOTHER, MAA, AMMA, MAI- whichever way we call, the feeling is the same, the role’s the same.
Do we really understand/ value this relationship unless one reaches this stage in one’s own life? I guess not. And that’s what is the beauty/ complexity of this relationship. Since the time you are born, this one lady is behind you pushing you, before you guiding you, besides you supporting you. If you realize, the only term that repeats and holds importance in the above sentence is “you”. Yes, her world revolves around you. She has nothing but you, “her child” who is the world for her. You see the world through her eyes, holding her “pallu” in the beginning, you only like her company, you only have food with her hands, and you only sleep on her lap.
As time progress, you grow, you feel she is not the world for you, you have the materialistic world waiting for you, offering you lot more pleasures, money, friends to hang out with, tasty cuisine’s to munch and blasty rooms to dance and wine away. Not our mistake. The world is like that. So easy to shrug off the responsibilities but difficult to understand and follow what our heart says then. It’s simple, and that’s the difference between her and us. It’s only her heart that rules for her kids and it’s the mind that rules us. It’s the same umbilical cord that binds us, but does different thoughts. Strange creation of God indeed.
You grow further, start working. But she still remains the same. She talks the same” Stupid stuff”, she still has the same set of questions and thoughts all the time. “Where are you, What are you doing?, How are you?, What did you have for food?, Take care of your health, Just don’t go behind money, pleasures and status, See what suits your health, Get proper sleep”. The list is never ending. Soon comes the stage where the kid as an adult gets into relationships, gets married and there enters the other mother in one’s life-The so called “Mother- in- law” (never understood this term though), how can a mother be created by law? Whatever the term be, the concept is the same, thoughts are the same, image is the same, only that the relationship is sown by law and grown and reaped by us.
Not the way, our television serials portray as the typical, cruel mother-in-law’s. It’s the same mother, who bought up your spouse, your better-half. Her kids are the world for her. The person, who gets into her children’s life forever as their better half, is never her foe, unless her kid is at any danger or harm or in a trouble. It’s just a matter of perceptions. Even before marriage, kids already distance themselves from their parents. It is not something that a space is created between mom and her kids after they get married. Its how one interprets it.
I really admire these 2 women in my life. Each is strange yet so real and fascinating in their own way. Sometimes you don’t really understand, whether you really were wrong in understanding your biological mom, or is it that all mom’s are different. Whichever way, these 2 are a blessing of god for me, who in their absence, have been given the powers to give me birth, nurture, guide and pray for me, and who have been my friends, guides, philosophers, critics of my life, and who can never be replaced nor stopped for her dedication, love and support that she renders throughout her life. Nothing that can ever repay her kindness. “MAA TUJHE SALAAM”.
–Sreelekha Gopal Iyer
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