Growing up as teenager was the most turbulent period of my life. I am still a young adult so i can’t really tell if there still more chaos to come. Talking about turbulence, i do not mean the physical whirlwind like experience in the middle of the ocean but then i had so much, i had so many things i wanted to do, even though they were things i had earlier been taught to be bad. I began to feel caged. I needed explanations for all the restrictions; i wanted to know why i could not do what others were doing. I had so many things i was curious about. I was not interested in simple explanation but personally experience of stuff. I mean the few really distinguished guys in high school then. Apart from the academic titans, were those who were into stuffs my parents and teachers had taught me to be wrong. I suddenly developed a huge urge to belong. I wanted recognition, wanted to be seen, heard and respected. So deep within me, i had this battle going on, whether to flow with the tide or not. For instance, i had to choose between staying in school and leaving during recess to join friends in various hide outs within our community. Talking about student hide outs, we had a lot of them. There was this restaurant where students could stay all day playing games, betting and drinking. There was another one where young school lads could hang out and smoke marijuana which was the only hard drug that they could afford, and there was this one room apartment occupied by my friend and his brother where we could watch pornographic movies and mess around with young ladies in our school and nearby girls only high school. I had many options and been punctual in school classes was the most unattractive one. It wasn’t fun at all. Especially the math class where you get one answer wrong and you get punished. Why would one want to stay in school, while other folks are having fun playing games, smoking and engaging in sex? What do u get from staying in school anyways? Being called mama’s boy by your classmates and looked down upon by happening girls was not appealing at all.
The decision to remain in school was a tough one and i wisely chose one of the seemingly attractive alternatives–my friend place. Have i told you that getting a ticket into such places meant doing everything to earn the respect of the company you intend to join? You are either good at playing games and betting, drinking the most alcohol, or puffing better than others. Most of the groups then would gladly admit a wannabe if he showed eagerness to learn when he is not so good. He, however would need to learn fast so as to rise from the ranks to the top.
One day at the beginning of my final year in high school, we were playing at my friends place when somebody brought up the topic of ambitions and dreams. Each person mentioned his dream and ambition. My best friend said that he wanted to be an industrial chemist. I wanted something that will keep me in contact with people like marketing, business administration or law. I remember somebody wanted to be a medical doctor while another wanted to be an aeronautical engineer. Everyone had a dream that could only be fulfilled if we choose the unattractive alternative of staying in school. We did not discuss the need for us to decide wisely and quit truancy but deep within me and i guess it was same for all of us, i knew going back to school was the only way i could realize my dream.i was already lagging behind in school so i chose new hangouts for my self -the school library and the community library.
I am glad i decided to go back to my books.the decision earned me a place among the best on academic roll call based on the ordinary level result. My decision earned me a college admission immediately after high school and a first degree in business administration.the choice i made several years ago led me to the greatest discovery of my life,i discovered myself.i realized despite all i have done that there is always an ability within each individual to change,so i changed.i learned that i do not have to engage in vices to belong or to earn respect.i also realized that truly respectable individuals are those who stick to their values and refuse to bow in to pressure from peers.the distinguished ones are those who sacrifice pleasure for their dream and not those who forfeit their dreams for pleasure.the real man which we all want so badly to be is”nt the one who always have beautiful girls at his beck and call but those who will settle for no less than their dream,those who will not succumb to the pressure of their environment and who will stand for what they believe in even if it means standing alone.real men are those who will not trade their end for their means.those who don’t buy respect by wearing designer clothes,driving expensive good looking cars,throwing parties and joining clubs they ordinarily cannot afford,or engaging themselves in dangerous and risky behavior but earn respect by being a positive influence on the environment and by seeking knowledge to gain an edge,people who are tagged exceptional because they would not allow anything to stand between them and their dream.i discovered i have the ability to be whatever i wished to be,if i am willing to give life to my wishes not by visiting a magician but by believing in myself,getting my priority right,staying focussed and work hard.
If i must achieve my dream i have to stick to it and if i must stick to it i have to let go of all the other sticky stuffs for the mean time.what are these sticky stuffs?they are things one engages in which are capable of taking over ones life thereby causing a huge distraction from a set goal.i have noticed that ones dream is mark of their individuality since individuals have different dreams,meaning different ends and different timing one must choose the right company,if one wants to be progressive join the progressive train,the wrong company will kill your spirit and drive.as an immigrant,if u still want to go to college make friends with colege grads,undergrads and college bound immigrants.if you have a college degree and you put with a cab driver you are likely to end up driving a cab all your life.same applies to security guards,waiters and the rest.this might be subject to some exceptions but it goes a long way in buttressing the fact that company usually has a strong influence on the individual so once you know your destination,move with people who are going in the same direction.the right company will will give you the right information,create a competitive environment and motivate to achieve your goal and success.if you want to stay off drugs don`t move around with junkies or someone in rehab for such a problem.if you don`t want to end up divorced,ensure that neither you nor your spouse befriends a divorcee.this might be little offensive but our company has a way of rubbing off on us.
Finally,as i mentioned earlier,the real man is`nt the one who always has beautiful girls at his beck and call or with fine cars gotten on loan,or as a payoff from a dirty deal,but those who will not settle for anything less than their dream,those who will not succumb to the pressure of their environment,those who will stand for what they believe in even if it means standing alone and those who will not trade the end for the means.my dad used to tell me that the world is full of opportunities,make use of all the opportunities you can.never get so involved with the means as to lose focus of the end.he also said something about overdoing whatever you are doing if you want to succeed therein,to achieve one`s dream,one must be willing to go an extra mile,do the unusual,give up the sticky stuffs,nice but irrelevant company,do away with distraction,persevere,work and work harder and set priorities.bringing one`s dream to life is the key to fulfillment,it is the best way to earn respect,gain acceptance and become rich and famous.it is a magic only you can perform.so get on with it.don`t watch your dream fade into an illusion,bring your dream back to life.get started now,if you can conceive it,you can get it.
– Akhil Aryan