accountant joke

Advertisement

 

1)

Four laws of accounting:

 

  • Trial balances don’t.
  • Working capital doesn’t.
  • Bank reconciliations don’t.
  • Return on investments don’t.

2)

An accountant is having a hard time sleeping and goes to see his doctor: 
“Doctor, I just can’t get to sleep at night.” “Have you tried counting sheep?” “That’s the problem – I make a mistake and then spend three hours trying to find it.”

3)

A businessman tells his friend that his company is looking for a new accountant. His friend asks: “Didn’t your company hire a new accountant a few weeks ago?” The businessman replies, “That’s the accountant we’re looking for.”

4)

A fellow is walking into a hospital and sees two doctors down on their hands and knees in one of the flower beds. He goes over and says, “Can I help? Have you lost something?” “No,” says one of the doctors. “We’re about to do a heart transplant on an accountant and we’re looking for a suitable stone.”

5)

An accountant is someone who knows the cost of everything and the value of nothing.

6)

Old accountants never die. They just lose their balance.

7)

Q: What’s the most wicked thing a group of young accountants can do? 
A: Go into town and gang-audit someone.

8)

Q: What’s an extroverted accountant? 
A: One who looks at your shoes while he’s/she’s talking to you instead of his/her own.

9)

Q: There are three kinds of accountants in the world. 
A: Those who can count and those who can’t.

10)

Q: What’s a shy and retiring accountant? 
A: An accountant who is half a million shy and that’s why he’s/she’s retiring.

11) 

Q: What does an accountant use for birth control? 
A: His/her personality.

12)

Q: Why don’t accountants read novels? 
A: Because the only numbers are page numbers.

13)

Q: What do accountants suffer from that others don’t? 
A: Self-depreciation.

14)

Q: When do accountants laugh out loud? 
A: When someone asks for a raise.

15)

Q: What’s an accountant’s idea of trashing his/her hotel room? 
A: Refusing to fill out the guest comment card.

16)

Q: When does a person decide to become an accountant? 
A: When he realizes he doesn’t have the charisma to succeed as an undertaker.

By Amit B

 

Advertisement
The following two tabs change content below.
We, at BMS.co.in, believe in sharing knowledge and giving quality information to our BMS students. We are here to provide and update you with every details required by you BMSites! If you want to join us, please mail to [email protected]
6 Comments
  1. Valerie 2 years ago

    Various online learning resources describe these strategies in-detail, so
    there’s you should not repeat those here.

Leave a reply

BMS.co.in is aimed at revolutionising Bachelors in Management Studies education, also known as BMS for students appearing for BMS exams across all states of India. We provide free study material, 100s of tutorials with worked examples, past papers, tips, tricks for BMS exams, we are creating a digital learning library.

Disclaimer: We are not affiliated with any university or government body in anyway.

©2020 BMS - Bachelor of Management Studies Community 

A Management Paradise Venture

Ask Us On WhatsApp
or

Log in with your credentials

or    

Forgot your details?

or

Create Account