photographer jooke


1) How many photographers does it take to change a light bulb? 50. One to change the bulb, and forty-nine to say, “I could have done that!” – Anonymous

2) If an old man asks a young girl for a date…
That’s his business.
If the young girl accepts…
That’s her business.
If the old man and the girl decide to marry…
That’s their business.
However, if they want great wedding photographs…
THAT’S MY BUSINESS!!! – Anonymous – – sign on studio wall

3) The quickest way to make money at photography is to sell your camera. – Anonymous

4) Top ten reasons to date a photographer
1) They work well in the dark
2) They’re used to funny smells
3) They make things develop
4) They work well on many settings
5) They know how to focus
6) They can make big things look small and small things look big
7) They work well from many different angles
8 ) They zoom in and out. And in and out and in and out and in and out…
9) They shoot in many different locations
10) They can find the beauty in anything
– Anonymous

5) Stranger: “That is beautiful child you have there.”
Mother: “That’s nothing. You should see his photograph.” – Anonymous

6) Having a camera makes you no more a photographer than having a hammer and some nails makes you a carpenter. – Claude Adams

7) Forgetting to load the camera just makes it a test session. – Catherine Jo Morgan

8) I am unspecialized in a very specialized profession. Some commercial clients aren’t quite sure how to take me. Some probably think I’m dead because I’ve been around so long. – Elliott Erwitt

9) A photographer from a well know national magazine was assigned to cover the fires at Yellowstone National Park. The magazine wanted to show some of the heroic work of the fire fighters as they battled the blaze. When the photographer arrived, he realized that the smoke was so thick that it would seriously impede or make it impossible for him to photograph anything from ground level. He requested permission to rent a plane and take photos from the air. His request was approved and arrangements were made. He was told to report to a nearby airport where a plane would be waiting for him. He arrived at the airport and saw a plane warming up near the gate. He jumped in with his bag and shouted, “Let’s go!” The pilot swung the little plane into the wind, and within minutes they were in the air. The photographer said, “Fly over the park and make two or three low passes so I can take some pictures.” “Why?” asked the pilot. “Because I am a photographer,” he responded, “and photographers take photographs.” The pilot was silent for a moment; finally he stammered, “You mean you’re not the flight instructor?” – Anonymous

10) People say photographs don’t lie, mine do. – David LaChapelle – Collector’s edition of Life, the Eisie Issue, spring 1998 , Page: 137

11) First Person : “Is that camera fully automatic?” Second Person : “No. You have to take the film to the chemist!” – Anonymous

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